I don't deny it
by Lonelyadelaide
Summary: Remus's deepest secret is uncovered in third year. Trust is hard, Poppy Pomfrey is sweet, and pranks are started to be discovered. Maybe some romance later (not Pomfrey!) but mostly hardcore friendship.
1. Chapter 1

"Have you noticed how secret Remus is about his mum?" Sirius was lounging on his bed, being melancholic. Remus had just left to see his mother again, and the three remaining third year Gryffindor boys were back from Hogsmead early because of a truly terrifying thunder storm. Not that any of them would admit to being scared...in fact the only one who had was Remus Lupin.

"Maybe she's as evil as your mum," James seemed unconcerned, scribbling on a piece of parchment and crossing stuff out again, "and he doesn't want us to know."

Sirius snorted. "If the most noble matriarch of the Black household was sick every month, I wouldn't waste time and energy on seeing her. She'd probably kill me for coming home anyway." he rolled over onto his back and unwrapped a chocolate frog.

"It makes sense, though," mumbled Peter, through his own mouthful of chocolate. "I mean, if she's mean, it would explain all the bruises and cuts and stuff."

"True." Sirius stared moodily at his frog. He didn't want to think about his mum, or his best friend getting hurt-by anyone. Hm...Remus loved chocolate. Just their luck he was gone for Hogsmead-there was a fabulous opportunity to hex Narcissa and Malfoy, but none of them were clever enough to have pulled it off. Maybe he hadn't left yet...the Black rolled off the bed with a loud thump. "I'm going to go look for him and bring him some sweets for the train. Maybe he's still here."

Peter offered up a sugar quill and James, after pouting, handed over a licorice wand and two of his chocolate frogs. Sirius took his leave and went to look for Remus in the great hall, where he assumed McGonnagal would meet the golden eyed boy. Nobody was there, however, except a few ill-looking fifth years studying for OWLs. As Sirius turned to leave, he heard a familiar voice in the hall. Hurrying, he saw Remus with Madam Pomfrey and Professor Slughorn.

"Remus!" The boy turned with a look of surprise.

"Sirius? Aren't you supposed to be in Hogsmead?"

"We came back because of the thunderstorm. Good thing you're going home for a bit, it's a fierce one!" Sirius thought he saw a flicker of despair cross his friend's face, but was sidetracked by the others standing there. "Where's McGonnagal? Doesn't she usually take you to the train?"

The staff members exchanged a look, Remus hesitated. "She was busy, so Madam Pmfrey said she'd take me. Professor Slughorn was giving me a potion to take to my mum." Madam Pomfrey nudged Remus lightly, and he said quickly "I have to go, Sirius. See you on Monday."

"Oh. Okay. Wait! Do you want some sweets for the train ride? Keep your mind off the thunder." Sirius grinned. Remus hesitated again, but then a smile crossed his drawn face and he took the proffered sugar.

"Sure! Thanks, Siri. Bye."

"Bye, Rem!"

Sirius pattered up the stairs to a window that overlooked the grounds. He wanted to see how easy it was to leave the Hogwarts grounds by way of the main gate. He was sure Remus would know, but it was unlikely that the mostly-rule-abiding boy would tell his less-than-innocent friend. Sirius spotted Madam Pomfrey and Remus immediately. Bizarrely enough, they were moving across the grounds towards the forest instead of to where the train was. As they drew farther and farther out of Sirius's line of vision, Madam Pomfrey put her arm around Remus's thin waist. Sirius rolled his eyes-trust Rem to play the pity card on the pretty young healer. By the time he look back, they had disappeared beyond the whomping willow.

James was getting frustrated. There was apparently nothing he could do that got a red headed girl out of his mind. He was annoyed-he didn't even like girls! They were boring creatures who were always too smart for any fun. Besides, Lily Evans, the red head on his mind, was friends with a Slytherin! He supposed she was pretty, but...

"James?"

"Ungh"

"Can you come look at something?"

"...no."

"James, what if Remus's mum is really sick? Like, what if she can't be cured and can't help why she gets sick? I mean, say it was a re-occurring thing...like, for instance, maybe..."

"Merlin, Peter! Spit it out!" Sirius chuckled when the smaller boy jumped at his sudden appearance.

"Um. Okay. Have either of you read the DADA book?" there was a pause, and then they all laughed. "Um, anyway, when I was getting help from Dedalus, he was doing a paper on, um, werewolves and it looked interesting..."

"And you think that Remus's mum is a werewolf? Funny, Peter. He'd be dead by now." James turned his eyes back to his scribbles and huffed in annoyance when he saw that he had written Evans' name in cursive.

"Okay, good. I didn't think that could be it, but I don't know why she gets sick so much."

James idly scratched out what he had written, and looked up at Sirius. "Did you catch up with him? ...Sirius? ...Sirius...?"

The Black was standing in the middle of the room. The other boys could almost see the gears grinding to life in his brain. Connecting. Connecting scars and scratches. Connecting monthly visits and Madam Pomfrey. Connecting, connecting, connecting...the full moon. Tonight. And last month, they had been planning a prank for the full moon and Remus had left to see his mother again. How long had they been swallowing this lie? Sirius fell sick himself when he realized that it had been three years. Their whole time at Hogwarts. James was suddenly in front of him, holding his arms and telling him to sit down, to breathe. Sirius felt very glad to have a trunk behind him for when he sat down very quickly.

"James." he rasped. "Not him mum. Never his mum. It's him."

"It's him, what?"

"He's the wolf. Oh, Merlin, he's the wolf!" Sirius put his head in his hands shakily. James shoved something under his face.

"...What?"

"Eat it, Sirius."

Obligingly, he took a bite. And almost choked when he realized it was chocolate. He pushed James's hand with the offensive sweet away.

"Siri, it was just a stupid idea of Peter's. Relax, mate, there's no werewolf."

"Yeah, forget about it. It was stupid." Peter chimed in, anxiously.

"NO!" Sirius stood up, facing his friends with rage in his face. "Don't you see? It makes sense! The scratches! They're never from his dad's cat! They're bigger claws, his claws! The chocolate! It keeps dark creatures at bay! And look!" Sirius stormed over to Peter's divination work and shook it in front of the two. "What is tonight?"

"A full moon." whispered Peter.

"Exactly!" the rage faded away and was replaced by despair. "Why didn't he tell us?"

"Whoa, easy buddy." James approached him warily, like he was the wolf. "Yes, it makes sense, but it might actually be his mum. What if she's, I don't know, restrained, and he has to take care of her when she transforms? I know St. Mungo's doesn't take werewolves."

"No. James." Sirius's face crumpled. "It makes too much sense. She couldn't have not bitten him in all that time. And one more thing." he took a breath, remembering. "He doesn't go to the train station. I saw him and Madam Pomfrey walking towards the forest. How stupid have we been? He's never gotten on the train. He transforms in the forest and then stays in the hospital wing. Merlin. Why didn't he tell us?"

"I don't know, Sirius, but we're marauders-" James stated firmly, "And there's only one thing to do now."

Peter and Sirius looked at the grimly determined look in the Potter's eyes. Sirius nodded slowly. Peter inwardly sighed.


	2. Chapter 2

"We don't even know when the moon sets! We could be here all night and not-"

"Shh!"

"Ouch! James, get off my foot!"

"Oh, sorry, darling.""

"Jamie-pie, if you ever call me that again-"

"Likewise."

"Will you guys shut up! Just, just let's get this over with."

"Well, well, what a surprise, Peter! Weren't you the one moaning about being there all night?"

"I was, but it's obvious you're not going to get any sleep, and I'd rather be doing this than trying to sleep and wondering what your brilliant plan is."

"Alright, Sirius, can you unlock the door?"

"_Alohamora_." The door to the hospital wing swung open silently. There was a shuffling noise, and then the door was shut. Three boys moved into a corner and sat down on the floor. They waited.

Remus groaned as a deafening clap of thunder rolled overhead. He felt naseaus, as usual, and he seemed to have hurt his arm rather badly. Again.

"Remus?" came Madam Pomfrey's soft voice. "Are you alright?"

He couldn't form words yet, but tried to move his head in reply. The young nurse came into view with a bottle and a spoon.

"Don't try to move yet, dear. Can you open your mouth?"

The werewolf obliged, swallowing the sweet liquid gratefully. He could feel his bones mending themselves and his head felt clearer. Madam Pomfrey ran her wand over the various cuts and bruises, relieving the aches and stitching the worst scratches back together. When she was mostly satisfied, and Remus had himself a bit more collected, she handed him his pajama bottoms and wrapped a warm, soft cloak around his shoulders. The first year had been an awkward one, Remus not feeling very comfortable about waking up naked and bloody and having a pretty nurse tend to him, but as the time went by, Madam Pomfrey became one of his favorite people, and he her favorite student by far. There was nothing awkward now, even as he grew. In fact, if truth be told, he was more comfortable naked in front of the healer than even the marauders-and they did everything together. James and Sirius had once snuck into the prefects' bathroom and had a bath together. Remus had to stop thinking when Madam Pomfrey took him by the hands and pulled him up. Everything hurt. It always did. The potion Slughorn had found worked wonders for the day after, though. The young woman steadied her charge, and when the room stopped spinning, she led him back down the tunnel under the Whomping Willow. They talked about simple things like how scary thunderstorms actually were, and whether or not care of magical creatures would be cancelled or held inside the owlery. When they got to the tunnel entrance, Madam Pomfrey touched the knot and the thrashing tree froze. It was almost dawn, though you would never know it for the black of the sky. The two of them tiptoed into the castle and Madam Pomfrey whisked them through a specially made secret passage that ran straight to the hospital wing. If there were any wayward students up and this hour, there would be no questions asked and no hassle.

Sirius was just nodding off for the umpteenth time, when James hissed his name. There was a creaking by the far wall, and a section of the wood panelling swung forward. Madam Pomfrey stepped into the room, followed by a beaten Remus. She caught him around the waist as he began to teeter, and pulled the cloak off his shoulders.

"Usual bed, Remus. There's no one else here today." She supported him over to the bed closest to their hiding corner. He lowered himself into it carefully, and turned onto his back so the healer could finish her administrations. There were a few more spells whispered over the boy, and he got another dose of the sweet tasting potion. Tenderly, Madam Pomfrey pulled the duvet up to the werewolf's chest and smoothed his hair. Remus smiled up at her tiredly.

"Thanks for everything, Poppy."

Sirius and James shared a desparaging look-their friend was on first name terms with the school nurse? Oh, this was bad.

"You know I don't mind, Remus. I'll just go shower and dress now, if you're alright for now. Remember that it's good to cry."

He gave her a crooked smile and a yawn. "Have a good shower, I can't wait for mine!"

The nurse left, and Sirius couldn't help himself. He pulled the cloak off and ran over to the bed.

"Remus John Lupin! Why didn't you tell us you were a werewolf?" ignoring the strangled cry his friend made, Sirius wrapped his gangly arms around the thin shoulders and sat on the bed.


	3. Chapter 3

_Hey! I'm back! Sorry this is so short, but I have a super block right now. Any feedback would be wonderful!_

When Poppy Pomfrey came out of her room to check on Remus, she was dumbfounded to see the teenage werewolf crying—sobbing-in the arms of Sirius Black. James Potter and Peter Pettigrew were kneeling beside the bed that held the two boys, looking stricken. Sirius himself was looking a little bit panicked, unsure of what to do now that one of his best friends had dissolved into tears at his hug. After a few minutes of this, Remus seemed to collect himself. He stopped the shuddering sobs, his breathing calmed down, and his shoulders relaxed. Sirius carefully released his friend, James and Peter held their breaths.

Remus laughed weakly. He scrubbed at his face with his sleeve and smiled tearfully at his scared-looking friends.

"You don't hate me?" He choked out.

"REMUS!" four exasperated voices yelled.

"Do you think we would have snuck here afterhours if we didn't want to talk to you again?" James grinned shakily.

"Probably!" Peter muttered. Poppy smiled, not doubting it.

"And do you think I would have let you cry all over my shirt if I was afraid of you?" Sirius sounded slightly strangled, but his smile was there. Remus touched the damp shirt gently.

"But I'm a monster! A werewolf! I'm a-"

"Yes, Remmie, you are a wolf! Who is were! You're also Remus Lupin, the smartest boy in all of Hogwarts!" Sirius spread his arms and beamed. Then he grabbed one of Remus's wrists and held it up so he could see the hand. "Does this look like a claw?"

"Not anymore." Remus mumbled, trying to pull his arm out of Siruis's grip.

"No, it doesn't." James overrode the blond. "Now shut up and tell us what the deal is? You really turn into a wolf every month?"

"Yes."

"Are there more?" Peter still looked a little pale.

"No, don't worry." Remus smiled at him sadly, "I'm the only one. But how—how did you find out?" This question was directed at Sirius, who was still holding his wrist, their hands resting on Remus's lap.

"Some blond kid thought your mum was...was one, and beat you up. But I saw you and Pomfrey walking toward the forest and connected it."

Remus's lips quirked up at the thought of his sweet, tiny mum turning into a werewolf. His smile dropped when James leaned forward curiously.

"Is it true that you don't remember anything when you turn? How do you get so hurt? Do you hurt yourself or do you fight with creatures in the forest? Do you _really_ transform in the forest?"

"I think that's quite enough from you, boys." the healer decided it was time to intervene, as the wolf looked decidedly uncomfortable. "Remus needs to rest—he's had a hard night."

She had surprised the three visitors, all of whom jumped up and turned to look at her. It was as if they were expecting someone to attack Remus, the way they stood around him. When they realized it was just the young nurse Sirius and James started pleading for more time with the werewolf. Remus himself looked close to tears again and held out his arms like a child. Poppy moved over to the bed and he wrapped his arms around her waist and looked up at her imploringly.

"Dear Poppy, can my sweet, innocent little friends stay just a _tiny _bit longer? I promise the minute I get tired I'll send them away, and they won't get loud, and they'll be calm, and—"

"Yes, please?"

"We'll be good!"

"We won't keep him up!"

"I'll sing him a lullabye!"

"Oh, _no_, please, James!"

"What?"

"Hush!" Poppy smiled indulgently at the four begging boys. "You may have half and hour. Then go! And Remus," She looked down fiercely at the boy hugging her, "You need to _sleep_!"

After a rousing round of thanks, she left the Gryffindors to themselves. Remus smiled and lay back carefully. Sirius sat back on the bed, crossed his legs, and took Remus's hand again. Peter sat in the chair beside the bed and James lounged against Peter's legs.

"You know you don't have to stay here." Remus said softly, looking around. "I don't mind. I mean, you've got classes in the morning."

James rolled his eyes. "Remus, you couldn't make us leave if you had a wand and a spellbook. We just found out our friend is a werewolf and goes through wicked transformations every month. Sirius is holding you _hand_." He dodged a kick from a blushing Black and started laughing. Peter finished for him, smiling at the wolf.

"We're not going anywhere any time soon!"

"Besides," Sirius turned back to Remus, pink fading from his cheeks, "You haven't heard about James's latest stupidity. He had a piece of parchment and he was writing..."

"I was writing her name!" James looked stricken. "Over and over! I can't figure it out, Re! I just keep thinking of the red hair..."

By the end of the story, Remus was laughing and they were all yawning. When Poppy Pomfrey came out of her room to shoo the boys out, they were all asleep. She smiled and shook her head when she saw Sirius curled up on her charge's legs; they were still holding hands. Peter's head was lolling back in the chair and James had his head pillowed on Peter's lap. The healer conjured up blankets for the three and left, still smiling.

"Remus, you have such good friends. I just hope they don't scare easily."


End file.
